Hello All,
I thought I would go ahead and break the news for those of you who haven't heard.
As
of this past weekend, Cynthia and I have decided to get back together.
This long and nightmarish ordeal has been working on us both and our
hearts have turned back toward each other. We have agreed to do many
things differently this time and will be taking a communications class
together in July. I have taken the class already myself but wanted to
go again with her since many things are relevant to both of us and we
should invest that into "us".
I am very happy that we have not lost
each other for good. Despite all that went wrong the last couple of
years I love Cynthia very much and she loves me very much as well. It
is true that during the last two years many things went wrong. We
talked about them and agreed to work on them as we try to get more
balance in our new relationship. This is not a recycle of the old. It
is something brand new and each of us feels that excited feeling again
that new lovers feel but we will not have to learn everything about
each other all over again as we do know each other and have just passed
the six year mark a couple of weeks ago.
This has not changed my
plans to return to the West for training in my new career field. I am
still saving up money for that and later today I have to go pick up the
check at Pracs ($3K). The study concluded yesterday. In 29 days I will
be doing another one to continue to build up the savings. I am about
half way to the amount of money I will need for school in Portland,
Oregon and have a place in mind to stay that isn't going to cost too
much. In the interim, I will have to do one maybe two more studies
depending on their value. The one I just did was valued at $5.5K and
Pracs paid $2500 of that to us earlier in two installments, which is
good because $1K went to establish my money market account and the rest
I needed for expenses and crisis handling.
For the time being I am
still in Moorhead, MN to finish stuff up down here, like the study
related activities. It didn't make sense to return to Ada yet only to
have to come back down here right away. I was up there this weekend. I
did some stuff around the house and still have more that I want to do.
Cynthia just simply hasn't had the time working two jobs and trying to
get sleep when she can. Its my aim once I am driving the truck that she
will be able to quit her second job and get more rest and more time at
home. Its going to be more of a partnership with us now, not just
Cynthia with her agenda and Echelon with his agenda. We are aiming for
more closeness and both realize many areas where things went wrong now
that we have been apart and 20/20 hindsight. I should be going HOME
tomorrow though! Home - Its a word we often take for granted until we
don't have one anymore and I hope that NONE of you ever have to have
that feeling of waking up in the morning in a strange place and
realizing that you have no place to call home anymore because it is one
of the most draining and deflating feelings a human can feel. I may be
Goth but I do not will to dwell in the depths of depression like that
and hope I will not have to endure anything like that ever again. An
experience such as this has been does change you and I suspect in some
ways I am not yet aware of. I have enough material to write a book
someday if I so will but right now things are still heading up and
there is much to look forward to now. For that I am grateful!
So
this past weekend started Friday, when Cynthia picked me up, we ate
lunch and she needed to get some supplies but we were very happy and
having fun with each other again. She had to go to her second job in
the afternoon and dropped me at the house, where I spent a lot of time
working on it, doing needed housework and the like.
Saturday, when
she got home from her main job, we ate and cuddled literally the whole
rest of the day. Sunday, we did the same. I have not felt that loved or
wanted in a very long time and I am sure Cynthia would say the same
thing.
For those of you who don't know, we were able to see each
other since last Thursday and communicate by phone & email for a
couple of weeks prior to that, so things are not quite as fast as they
seem by reading here. There have been many incremental steps along the
way that I just haven't written about because it would simply take too
long to explain and I wanted to wait until I was sure what direction
things were going in.
There is a chance, just a chance at this point
I will be out in August with her for a tiny visit. I will keep you
posted on this and I will resume posting in LJ now as I see fit.
Sincerely,
Echelon
Hello All,
I am thinking of selling a lot of my things off sometime soon, including most of my books save for some general titles. I don't know when I will get back up to Ada, MN where they are located but I want to consolidate my inventory, put them online at Amazon's Market Place and sort through stuff I will be selling on ebay as well. So there is nothing I can do about this yet without getting back up there in person to do the work I have to do on this but I thought I would throw this out for my people as what I intend to do. The proceeds will be invested into my money market account in the "Joint Future Building Fund", where they will earn interest and help me to provide a better tomorrow.
As the time draws closer, I will post where my items can be found.
Also, I still want to do a garage sale with Cynthia sometime as there are many smaller items we both wish to get rid of that can probably be done better on a more local scale.
Echelon
There are two important things I am looking forward to in the mail and the most important one is the key to contact so to speak. I am chomping at the bit to send someone an email, an ecard, even a phone call but I cannot do anything until I have the spec sheet in hand. Iv'e been checking the mail like a kid anticipating the arrival of Santa Clause on Christmas or something. From what Iv'e been told it should be here anytime this week now, hopefully tomorrow. I would just go down and get it in person but then the question may come up, "How did you know this would be here"? AND I'm not sure when the specs go into effect, so that is why I'm hesitant to go announce that I know about this. I will say its very very tempting to me though, I want so bad to communicate with Cynthia again, but I must defer to patience because if something were to go wrong it could blow the whole works and things are bad enough for me right now as it is. The other thing I am looking for in the mail is a surprise that I want to share with Cynthia when I am able.
